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Ladies and gentlemen, devoted henchmen and maniacal fans,
Psychosis Magazine and it's Parent company, PsychotiCorp, is pleased to
announce the appointment of Morris Mahoof to the position of Editor.
Morris, or Moe, will be replacing Bob Craypoe. |
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Bob Craypoe is still an employee of PsychotiCorp but only works as the Primary
web developer for PsychotiCorp. We feel that Bob was becoming entirely too
outspoken to remain in the position of Editor. We believe that he should be
much easier to suppress if confined to his new position and forced to work in
the boiler room with no access to restroom facilities or drinkable water. Sleep
deprivation may also aid in adjusting his attitude.
Please don't be alarmed or concerned regard ng the health, safety or mental
stability of Bob. Bob has become accustomed to working for low wages, in
terrible working conditions and with very little appreciation or acknowledgement
from his employers. In other words, he's worked in the retail, manufacturing
and insurance industries.
Moe Mahoof has been with the Magazine since the creation of it. He started out
as the cover model for the magazine and worked in the mail room. We felt it was
important to promote from within. Especially since people from outside of the
company wouldn't dream of working for what we pay our employees. Moe has been
greatly blessed with the wisdom of not only knowing how much butt to kiss but
also knowing the right ones to kiss. We also believe that the best policy would
be to promote the stupidest individual to the primary position of authority in
order to keep in line with corporate America's standard operating procedures.
We promise that there will be no degradation in the quality of our publication.
It will suck every bit as much as it has in the past. Thank you, and have a
wonderful day. |
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